Moving on After the Death of a Loved One


When death knocks on our doors, well-meaning family members and friends come to see about us. They share familiar verses of Scripture and words of sympathy and condolences, but most of the time, we are not feeling it. Our hearts are so heavy with grief that all we want to do is go somewhere, crawl under something, hide, and cry our eyes out. Even though we know that as sure as we are born, we are one day going to die. However, we don’t always grasp its true meaning.

Death is a part of life, but it can be challenging to accept. The Word says, “Precious in the sight of the LORD is the death of his saints” (Psalm 116:15 ESV). Those of us who are deeply rooted in the Word know and understand this. However, the flesh in us hurts when we lose a loved one to death. Sometimes we become bitter and angry when death comes. That’s when our faith and trust in God must take over and guide us through the process. Only fervent prayer and time will help us to heal.

Yes, when our loved ones swap time for eternity, we are going to miss and grieve for them. However, if we allow it to overtake us, then we will stop living. God wants us to live and be happy, but leave the rest to Him. Ezekiel 18:32 (ESV) affirms this: “For I have no pleasure in the death of anyone, declares the Lord GOD; so turn, and live.” After my father went Home to Glory in December 1999, for several weeks, I went to the cemetery almost daily. At night I would sit up late, after my children went to bed, and indulge in sweets and watch movies. Finally, I woke up one day and realized I was dying inside and gaining unhealthy weight. I needed to move on because I had three sons to raise and still had my whole life ahead of me.

When death comes, it seems that “the rain pours heavier and heavier.” However, God said in Ecclesiastes 7:1 (ESV), “A good name is better than precious ointment, and the day of death than the day of birth.” Although this seems like a paradox, there is joy after grief, so we can move on after death. Always abound in the faith, and never leave home without Him!